This means war!!

Man the battle stations, there are invaders in Two Turtles Garden of the four-legged variety! Ever since the first act of raking up the leaves, the damn squirrels have been digging heyooge (not just huge) holes in my garden. It annoyed me when it was in the flower beds. It irked me when it was hanging off of the bird feeder, spreading seedy messiness about. It ticked me off when it was in the violetty loveliness of the faerie garden. It peeved me when it was amongst the vinca and bulbs I am so patiently waiting to see sprout. The absolute last straw is them taking divots out of my carefully hand-pieced moss carpet.

All out warfare has commenced. I googled til I could google no more for tips on keeping squirrels from digging up your garden.

• Used kitty litter (for the predatorial foe aroma) Check!
  
• Let the cats out (same deal) Check!
• Pepper (Achooo!) Check!
• Crushed Red Pepper (AAARGH! MY EYES!) Check!*
• Laying in wait with my hose to blast them if they even glance in the vicinity of my garden. Check!
• Running them over with the car. Pondering that one, seriously.

I am thinking about installing a squirrel feeder elsewhere in my neighborhood so they will go sit on the damn cute little wooden chair and eat the little corncob off the table, strictly for my neighbor's enjoyment, of course. I can't stand the little fleabags, cute my foot! Now, get off my lawn!! Actually, in looking for a picture of the cute little table & chair feeder, I found a much, much better one, which I would rig to actually snap shut on the adowable wittle freaks.

* I'm sure this one will have the local chapter of PETA picketing at my garden for animal cruelty. Look, I like furry critters, but these little bastards have gone too far.